I've Taken Up Smoking

I've taken up a new habit on the road. Smoking. Actually, I don't do the smoking myself, I participate in secondhand smoking. Secondhand smoking is an artform. You have to be in the right (or should I say wrong) place at the right time to participate in this filthy habit.

The best part about secondhand smoking is that you save a lot of money on cigarettes. Your smoke benefactor, the smoker, pays for the cigs. Unfortunately, this way you don't get to choose your brand.

It is an easy habit to do here. Everyone seems to be smoking here. Everywhere I go I see people standing around in social circles sucking in that magical combination of oxygen and nicotine. Ahhhh.

All smokers seem to have mastered another artform. You've seen them do it. As soon as they finish inhaling all the carcinogen filled smoke they have to do something with the butt. Finding a butt can or garbage can is too easy and the responsible thing to do. No, instead they place the butt between their index finger and thumb and give it a quick flick. Who cares where it lands? It's only the environment.

When I checked into my room, the room reeked of stale cigarettes. After lugging all my belongings, for a three and a half week stay, across the country and up to the fourth floor; I hated to go through the exercise of moving it all into another room. So I stayed. How dumb was that?

I am sure that the old stale smoke hanging around the carpets and furniture in my room are going to transfer themselves on to my clothes. I am so sure that on Sunday, when I go to church, the Bishop is going to pull me aside and have a talk to me about my smoking habit.

So if you see me sidle up to a group of smokers somewhere and just hang around, inhaling the results of their efforts, go easy on me, I may be hooked.